Parenting Articles

Silence Is Golden: How to Respond Respectfully to Unwanted Parenting Advice and Judgment

Parenting can bring out the most interesting advice and remarks from people whom we may not even know—and, of course, from those close to us as well. Sometimes we don’t want this advice. Sometimes we resist it with every fiber of our being. There are...

Also labeled: Author Amy Phoenix, Issue #45

Signal Boost: Send Your Teen These Messages Instead of a Text

Social media has a reputation for being nothing but trouble for teenagers. There are many upsides to social media, not least of which is that it provides a way for teens to connect with one another. What concerns me more than simply the time spent...

A Message to Mums

My mother and father grew up in a society with no overprotective impulses—totally without cotton wool, as we say in New Zealand. Kids got on their bikes and were gone for the day. All was well as long as they were home for supper, or there’d be hel...

Where Are the Happy Babies?

Have we forgotten what babies need from (all of) us?I was so glad to meet a happy, confident, socially engaged baby this week. Baby Loren was a stark contrast to most babies that I encounter these days. Most tend to look distracted, unhappy,...

Raising A New Generation of Strong Women

Imagine if you were taught from an early age that, as Carla Hartley puts it, “birth is a medical event, preceded by an illness called pregnancy and ending with an emergency called labor.”

Face Off

No one likes getting caught in the crossfire of the Mommy Wars. But calling for a truce is misguided and dangerous.Ending the so-called “mommy wars” has become quite the news item, and one that everyone seems to get on board with. I mean, how...

A Question of Respect

(Or, Grown-Ups and Their Double Standards)When I decided I wanted to write a piece on respect, I imagined I’d do some kind of in-depth examination of one central, juicy question. Somewhat predictably, on the journey of looking for it, I...

The Twinkle in Your Parents' Eyes: Conscious Conception and Conscious Pregnancy

You know the expression, “When you were only a twinkle in your parents’ eyes.” The phrase conjures up the happiness of loving parents who truly want to conceive a child. It turns out it is also a phrase that sums up the latest genetic research...

The Myth of Self-Settling

Many people, parents and experts alike, advocate the idea of “teaching a baby to self-settle” or “self-soothe.” Self-soothing is often referred to as the holy grail of baby sleep. Once babies can self-soothe, parents are told to expect uninter...

Diagnosis: Does It Help or Hurt?

I received an e-mail yesterday talking about yet another “new” disorder. This disorder was for people who fixate on eating healthy. The author was talking about how people who don’t care what they are eating are “healthy,” and those who do care have a...

Letting Go

Being a mother to four young children can be an extremely challenging feat. There are days when I feel like everyone’s needs are clashing and I am left wondering if anyone is even remotely getting what they need. With four, or more, different ideas...

Routes Toward Trustful Parenting in Our Time

A variety of social trends have conspired to reduce trustful parenting, promote directive-protective parenting, and reduce children’s freedom over the past several decades. These include the decline of neighborhoods and loss of children’s outdoor pla...

On Becoming a Father

In Ancient Rome, to be a father, it was not enough to conceive the child. In fact, biological lineage did not matter. A man had to publicly declare his will and intention to become the child’s pater (the Latin word for father). The ceremony was...

Believing: The Neuroscience of Reverse Truths

While my children’s adolescence cured me of most of my theories, a few fundamental ones survived, and are even more boldly illuminated against the backdrop of passing years. One of these survivors is the principle of reverse truths. In traditional...

Mother and Child are Linked at the Cellular Level

The Mother and Child Connection As we approach this Mother’s Day, I wish to honor all mothers and show an understanding of the healing relationship we have shared with our mothers and our children, and how they have reciprocated this...

Why Children Need Community

Our indigenous roots reveal that children want and need to move beyond attachment to their parents.I’m all for natural parenting. The basic premise of such parenting, at least as I view it, is that you trust your children’s instincts and...

Compassion at Her Core

For the Batek people of Malaysia, nurturance equals leadership.Tanyogn was the kind of person who would be an asset to any community. She was highly intelligent, able to see through specious arguments, able to judge when the traders from...

Attachment and the Development of Resilience

As parents, we want nothing more than for our children to grow into autonomous, responsible, happy adults capable of living authentic, purposeful lives. Our relationship with them—described by scientists as attachment—is the single most important...

11 Things I Wish Every Parent Knew

After 25 years practicing pediatrics, and caring for thousands of children, I’ve noticed some patterns that offer me a deeper vision of health. I’d like to share some of those invaluable lessons with parents.

Making the Connection: How to Talk to Kids So They Respond!

Are you wondering how you can connect more deeply with your child? Would you like to know how to talk to kids using peaceful conflictresolution strategies to ease tension or calm aggressive behavior in children? Often, we can be triggered by...