Have you ever wondered why the faster you try to get things done, the more mishaps occur? Could it be that sometimes you actually get ahead of yourself and move too fast for your own good?
There is a natural rhythm to the universe. When we are in sync with this rhythm, life unfolds seamlessly. But when we try to force it and rush toward a destination or goal, we actually move faster than the speed of life. Getting out of sync with life’s natural rhythm often results in a myriad of challenges and issues. So, if your life is chaotic, or if you are stressed out, tired, fragmented, anxious and confused, or if things are breaking all around you, chances are you are moving faster than the speed of life.
Being out of sync is like the chain falling off your bicycle: No matter how fast you pedal, you’re not getting anywhere. Lots of effort but little result creates exhaustion and overwhelm.
Many years ago, I was a stressed-out single mom and business owner. I had about a million things to do each day, or at least it felt that way. I remember waking up each morning under an energetic blanket of overwhelm and anxiety. I didn’t want to get out of bed and face the day, but I had to—at least, until I realized that I didn’t have to. That idea took me by surprise and contradicted everything that I had ever believed about myself and my life. I questioned this new concept, but it secretly gave me strength, peace and resolve.
I began to start each morning by surrendering my day to a higher power. In the recesses of my mind I would whisper, “Today, I don’t have to do anything.” Ahhh… I could breathe. The layers of the heavy blanket began to dissolve.
We humans are incredibly resilient and tenacious, but at some point, we get so exhausted and stressed out that we have no choice but to eventually surrender. Things just aren’t working and we don’t have a clue on how to fix them, so as a last resort, we let go. Of course, letting go is exactly the right thing to do.
Here’s the thing: By letting go of everything, before my feet even touched the ground, I suddenly had the energy and desire to take inspired action, but without the urgency, stress or strain that previously engulfed me. By telling myself, “I don’t have to do anything today,” I became at choice with my days—with my life. I realized that despite how things might seem, I always had the choice to do, or to not do. My life was the way it was because it was my choice…and at any moment, I could make a different one.
From this perspective, I was no longer in a rush. I was no longer stressed. At some point, I felt the tectonic plates of my life slip into place. Anxiety began to melt away and I realized that the overwhelm which once swallowed me up could not exist if I was conscious and present in this moment.
When we surrender the stress and release the rush, we immediately realign with the universe. No matter how off-center we have been, alignment can happen in an instant, simply by letting go.
The first sign that we are aligned and in sync is that we feel better. We feel calm, peaceful and in the moment. No rush. No urgency. Just here, now. The second thing we notice is that things get done easier and more quickly, and sometimes they might even appear to get done on their own.
Synchronicity is simply being in sync with life. When you are in sync, everything good and fine lines up for you. You manifest what you desire with ease and grace.
So, I did just that. I slowed down, I chose my life and I became really, really present. Then the most amazing thing began to happen: Not only did I feel better, but my life began to get better. I was suddenly in sync with the rhythm of the universe. Everything got done that needed to get done—kids got fed, money got made and even books got written—but there was no longer stress or grief. There was the sweet dance that became my life. The things that once took all my energy, because I was resistant and not present, now seemed to get done without effort.
Ironically, I discovered that the more I slowed down, the more I accomplished, and the better the results!
At some point, I realized that my dance was the sweet dance that the universe had in store for me all along. By trying to force things, make things happen and do everything myself, I was actually causing unnecessary pain and hardship. The mere act of slowing down and letting go allowed the universe to do her magic, which is infinitely more powerful than anything I could ever do in many lifetimes.
Getting in Sync
To help you determine what shifts might make the most difference in your life, I offer the following:
You Are Not Alone
Sometimes we move faster than the speed of life because we believe that we are all alone, and we must do everything ourselves. Despite how it may seem, you are not alone on this journey. You are an intricate part of the universe—of life itself. When you believe that you are doing it all alone, anxiety and stress are the result. But it is those very emotions that tell you that you have unplugged from the rhythm of life, and it is time to let go so that you can plug back in.
Often, we keep super busy because we are afraid of meeting ourselves in the quietude. We are afraid that if we are alone and still, we might confront our weaknesses and have to deal with the shadows we have been avoiding. So, we run from one thing to the next— switching roles, playing with our identities, and hiding behind the illusion of busyness. Yes, it may be uncomfortable to “meet yourself” at first, but you cannot be in sync with life if you don’t know who you really are. Whether it is your body or your mind that runs a mile a minute in order to get in the flow of life, you have to stop and be still so that you can hear the quiet voice of your own true self.
Stress Is Fear
Disguised as Desire
The voice of stress says, “I have too much to do and not enough time to do it.” Stress is a liar. In fact, it is stress that shortens time and gives you more to do. When you think thoughts like, “I don’t have enough time” you are telling the universe, Don’t give me enough time. And when you think “I have too much to do,” you are telling the universe, Give me too much to do. Your thoughts program reality, so you must consciously program peaceful and harmonious thoughts.
Somehow we have been brainwashed with “work ethics” that tell us that in order to succeed we must work incredibly hard and sacrifice ourselves for the success of our desires. This is a myth. The only thing that you have to sacrifice in order to succeed is the belief that you must work so very hard and sacrifice yourself. Yes, success requires an exchange of energy— things don’t materialize out of thin air (at least not yet), but as the saying goes, “Work smarter, not harder.” Working smarter does not just mean innovation and efficiency, it also means a state of mind. If you are working from a state of overwhelm and stress, you are likely giving out more energy than you are getting back. If you are multitasking and not focused, you are also not getting an equal return for what you put in. However, when you are relaxed, focused and in a state of flow, the energy that you expend through your work is exponentially returned to you tenfold. Working smarter means engaging the power of the universe on your behalf.
Being in the flow with the universe doesn’t happen by forcing things or trying to control things. It only happens by letting go and trusting that flow, wherever it takes us. Does this mean that we really let go of control? In some ways, yes, but it also means that we take our power back as creators, which is well beyond the petty control of details. When it comes down to it, the only control that we really have is the control of our minds. You can make a huge difference in your life by beginning each morning by pre-paving your day. By envisioning your perfect day, you are telling the universe what to create for you. The universe will respond by giving you inspired action which will support your desires. Without desire, there is no inspire.
Universe for Help
Like a good parent, the universe will allow you to do whatever you want on your own and not interfere, but as soon as you ask for help, the power and energy of the universe conspires on your behalf. When we try to do anything ourselves, we experience more effort and fewer results, but when we invoke the magic of the universe, we experience less effort and more results. The key is asking! There is an infinitely great Source that loves you unconditionally and eternally, and this Source is always conspiring for your highest good, even when it appears otherwise.
Around this same time of surrender, one day when I was making my boys peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, I realized that my focus was elsewhere. I immediately recalled my energy and I put my entire attention on the task at hand. As I did, I could feel my love enliven the sandwiches that my children would soon be eating. In that moment I got it: I needed to put my love into everything, and so now I do. And, of course, it comes back to me in abundance.
Despite how it might seem, we are not equipped to multitask. You can really only do one thing at a time. Multitasking causes stress, and stress makes us less productive. As you focus on one thing at a time, be present. Don’t daydream or think about the next thing that you have to do. Be here now, and be present to the experience that you are having, as if it is the first and only time you will be doing what you are doing.
When we move faster than the speed of life, big and small mishaps are designed to slow us down, and get us back on track. This includes all sorts of unforeseen delays, up to and including slow drivers who cut in front of you on the highway when you are in a rush to get somewhere. Nothing is random—everything in your reality is specially selected. The universe is conspiring to wake you up! But first, you have to slow down and quiet your mind so that you can hear that wake-up call.
Get real and ask yourself, “Is this really something I want to do?” You might surprise yourself by answering yes, but if the answer is really no, then turn off the automatic pilot. Find a better way to live your life, or a better state of mind to do what you are doing. Life does not change until you ask it to change. You must be willing to let go of the way things are and willing to embrace new possibilities.
Give Up Identity
It is often our identities that keep us from being truly present and in the flow. Maybe we are so busy playing the good mom or dad that we forget to pay attention to our children, or we are so caught up in playing a career role that we forget who we are beyond the performance. Instead of being Superman or Superwoman, just be present. There is no stress in being present.
Detox Your Mind
It is often self-judgment that causes us to stress out and go faster than the speed of life. When we drop criticism and self-judgment and we let go of have-tos and shoulds, we become free to grow and flourish with life. Perfectionism is just another word for self-judgment.
Your No. 1 Priority
If you are overly busy or stressed out, chances are you are putting yourself last. This is the worst thing that you can do. In order to get in the flow of life, you must make yourself a priority. So, instead of “seeing if you have time” for working out, meditating or getting a massage, you must make self-care preeminent. Your body has immense wisdom, but in order to access that wisdom, you must take care of yourself. Listen to your body when it has guidance to offer, which is literally every day. Your body will be the first to tell you that you are moving faster than the speed of life.
You are meant to be happy, and if you are not happy, you are not in the flow of life. Unhappiness is your inner guidance system telling you that you are going in the wrong direction. If you get to the end of the road and you are stressed out and unhappy, turn around and find another way. Resistance to change is like digging a deeper and deeper ditch in a place you don’t want to be.
Nature is always in resonance with life. You never see a flower unnerved because it is not blooming fast enough, or a cloud upset because it didn’t make a deadline. When we spend time in nature, the rhythm of our bodies begins to sync up with the rhythm of nature and we, too, slide into resonance.
Breathing deeply brings you back into your body and aligns you with the present moment. Just taking 10 deep breaths tells the body and mind that it is safe to relax. While you are breathing deeply, you might as well imagine that you are breathing in beautiful golden light, and you are enveloped by the love of the universe.
This article appeared in Pathways to Family Wellness magazine, Issue #49.
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